Friday, October 31, 2014

Nightmare at San Siro


I remember it like it was yesterday, and yet I’m not even sure it was real. It happened on Friday, October 31st… Halloween. The Derby della Madonnina was scheduled to be played, and I had flown to Milano just to watch it. Through a friend of a friend of a friend, I had managed to get some really great tickets… right near where Berlusconi would be sitting, I couldn’t believe my luck. Little did I know that luck was not on my side at all…

The place of my dreams became a nightmare

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Cagliari 1, Milan 1: Changing Fortunes


This Milan rebuilding process was supposed to be painful. And yet here Milan stand, having dropped points in back to back games, yet are in third place in the league. You know, that mythical spot we were supposed to attain at the end of the season that many of us considered 100% insurmountable? And we achieved that distinction this week by holding back a very dangerous side with the powers of Zeman supernaturally propelling them up the table. Coupled with the news of Allegri’s demise at the hands of Antonini and Matri, if I didn’t know better, I’d say Milan’s fortunes just might be changing.

Jack's back

Cagliari vs. Milan: Trust No One



The truth is out there

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Cagliari-Milan Preview: Welcome to Zemanlandia


The last time we went to Cagliari, Balotelli was abused on and off the pitch, and Amelia was in goal. Now Balotelli is being abused at Liverpool around the clock, and Amelia is a player and technical director for a Promozione club (6th tier Italian football.) However, there’s a new sheriff in Sardegna, one whose teams play all-out attacking and entertaining football. I think his concept is for them to score as many goals as he smokes cigarettes, and that can be hard to keep up with. So before Milan’s record vs. Cagliari gives you some unfounded confidence, think again. And welcome to Zemanlandia.

The smoking gun

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Milan 1, Fiorentina 1: Parallel Universe


As a fan, first on my list of results would be a brilliantly played win with beautiful, entertaining football, of course. Second would be a win where we didn’t embarrass ourselves. And in third would be a draw where we played well but were evenly matched. Not making the list at all would be the way we played pretty much any game last season, which gratefully we seem to have gotten out of our system with all of those awful summer friendlies. But I thought this game was tense and exciting, with each team’s strengths neutralizing the strengths of the other team, a very evenly matched game. It was almost as if I were watching two teams from a parallel universe.

I salute you, too, sir

Saturday, October 25, 2014

Milan vs. Fiorentina: The Matri Free Zone


Milan have a wealth of attackers, Fiorentina have no real forwards who are healthy and available. Fiorentina played in the Europa League on Thursday, Milan are not in Europe this season at all. Milan are a surprising fourth in the table, Fiorentina sit in a disappointing ninth. But one thing both clubs have in common is that Matri is not on either of their rosters this year, after cursing both clubs with his presence last year.

He who will not be missed

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

5 Reasons You Will Never Read a List of 5 Things on This Blog


There is a common journalistic format that involves making lists of five things. And while the people who write these lists get paid to count to five for you, I don’t. I am not a journalist, although I did take journalism before and therefore decided that I never will work in that field. Especially because I could never in good conscience take any compensation for writing the drivel that accompanies these lists. Well and for so many other reasons. I don’t get paid a dime and my work may never be read by millions worldwide, either. But at least at the end of the day I can look at myself in the mirror and go to sleep with my soul in tact. Also, because I have something these journalists apparently don’t have: respect for my readers.

The Bonera of football journalism

Monday, October 20, 2014

Climbing Back Up


Every week of European competition this season hurts… a lot. A lot more than I thought it would. While it’s nice to focus on Serie A and maybe the Coppa Italia, playing in Europe is simply part of Milan’s DNA. The same DNA that Inzaghi is trying to restore. I don’t know for sure if we’ll make it back next season… I really hope so. But for now we have to be satisfied with climbing back up.

Every goal is a step in the right direction

Sunday, October 19, 2014

Verona 1, Milan 3: Konnichiwa, Verona


Verona fans were probably optimistic about their chances against Milan in their house, but I’m pretty sure any optimism they had was shattered by Honda’s second goal. To their credit, their team fought valiantly to the end, taking 22 shots, even if only eight of those were on target. But at the final whistle, they finished empty handed and sent Milan back home with all three points. Verona fans had undoubtedly hoped to injure Milan again, but they were given a surprise Honda greeting: “Konnichiwa, Verona.”

I think we'd all like to kiss Honda like that right now, Rami

Saturday, October 18, 2014

Verona-Milan Preview: More Than a Religion


Hellas Verona have surprised many this season with better-than-expected results. Perhaps the most surprising aspect of their campaign is their lack of goals. With only 6 goals in as many games, they are only behind Milan on goal differential. So if either team can take three points away from Verona on Sunday, it will be the team with the better defense. Or perhaps it will be the team for whose fans this game is more than a religion.

Mommy, please don't let their special needs player hurt us